Monday, January 4, 2010

Nathaniel's New Year's Resolutions...

...For Alex.

Dallas Cowboys helmetYou see, I returned home from partying with the Dallas Cowboys to discover that Alex had hijacked our blog--OUR BLOG--and written what was supposed to be a joint post of OUR geek resolutions for the New Year.

Well, he came up with resolutions for me, and I think it's about time I repaid the favor.

Except there's no way I could possibly top him.

So I guess I'll just need to dole out retribution instead.

I think it's about time Alex started doing some of the tough work around the blog. That's why he's going to resolve to start writing our Month in Revi--wait. He did that already.

Okay, then. Forget about new resolutions. Let's look back at the resolutions we made for 2009, and then I'll get my revenge by rubbing it in Alex's face how many more of my resolutions were kept than his. Allow me to recap:

Alex's resolutions:

- Buy less comics (single issues) > Success! The recession fixes everything.

- Buy fewer trade paperbacks (and stop buying the single issues as they come out, then buy the trade when that comes out) > Success! The recession fixes everything.

comic bags- Never again buy bags and boards > Success! I've been to several comics shops with Alex this year, and I can personally vouch for the fact that he now steals these items.

- Organize my comics collection (this, I promise, will never happen) > Success! There's a nice box of comics that were disorganizing his shelf that will be given away any day now!

- Publish my graphic novel > Succ--oh. Guess we better leave it at that. Bad subject.

- Stop complaining about not understanding anything that's happening in the DC Universe > Success! Now he just makes up his own explanations.

- Watch the remaining Star Wars movies > Success! Alex has now seen A New Hope, Empire Strikes Back, and Return of the Jedi, which are the only Star Wars movies that some fans will acknowledge at all.

Nathaniel's resolutions:

- Make a serious effort at finally, finally finishing my homebrew Super Mario World (which hasn't been in development as long as Duke Nukem Forever, but it's getting there) > Failure! I got two beta testers signed up... uh... last week. And I think I moved a Koopa Troopa a few inches to the left somewhere. So... progress?

- Release another level for either Jedi Knight II or III > Failure! I was way too busy working on my homebrew Super Mario World.

- Finish my in-progress Jetpack FAQ > Failure! I released an updated version in May and am halfway to the next update, but... it's still not finished. I was way too busy thinking up level ideas for Jedi Knight II and III.

Uhura- Walk away from the upcoming Star Trek movie without being upset in any way > Failure! Uhura ruined everything, including my ability to finish my Jetpack FAQ!

- Read enough comics to tackle Final Crisis and not be hopelessly confused > Failure! But at least I'm just about ready to go into Crisis on Multiple Earths. Writing about the new Star Trek movie got me sidetracked.

- Acquire a Wii and play through Mega Man 9 and Metroid Prime 3: Corruption > Fail--wait, no. This one's actually a success. Huh.

- Get Alex to watch the other Star Wars movies, a bit of Star Trek, and to witness some Mega Man > Failure! Alex claims he's watched my Mega Man videos on YouTube, but I have yet to see a post about them, so I think he's lying.

There you have it. As you can clearly see from the results of our New Year's resolutions for 2009, I... I...

...I could set the building on fire...

VERY WELL, Alex. You win THIS ROUND. But we shall have a REMATCH in ONE YEAR!

Here are the terms:

Nathaniel will:
- Make significant progress on his homebrew Super Mario World
- Release version 1.0 of his Jetpack FAQ
- Read through at least one of DC's Crisis series
- Read enough of the Marvel Ultimate Universe to do a full-blown Exfanding post on it
- Release YouTube videos of Mega Man 5 - 8
- Formally expose Alex to Star Trek
- Formally expose Alex to anime

Alex will:
- Lend Nathaniel all the issues of The Goon that he hasn't read
- Write a real post about Mega Man, and not some fluffy nonsense piece that simply has the words Mega and Man in it
- Learn how to do all the HTML wizardry Nathaniel does with the blog
- Play a video game with Nathaniel
- Play at least one session of Dungeons & Dragons with a group of people
- Join the Facebook Collective
- Open a llama ranch in Argentina

Let's just see who wins next time.

llama ranch

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