Thursday, October 23, 2008

Presidential Candidate #2: James T. Kirk

Yesterday we kicked off our introduction to the new candidates entering this year's Presidential race with a brief look at candidate Slappy McIntyre. Today, we would like to introduce a man who would boldly go where no President has gone before.

Kirk and SpockPresidential Candidate: James T. Kirk

Running mate:

Party affiliation:

Starship captain and Starfleet admiral; he was out saving the galaxy while your grandfather was in diapers

Reason for choosing running mate:
To win over the pointy-eared demographic that went unrepresented when Legolas dropped out of the running

Positions on the issues:
- Energy crisis: We need more power, Scotty!
- Immigration: Heightened security to protect against illegal aliens with ridged foreheads
- Gun control: All firearms should have an optional "stun" setting
- Domestic policy: A chicken in every pot; a woman in every port
- Foreign policy: Attack any nations we can't communicate with, then sleep with their women
- Gay marriage: Not unless I'm invited to the wedding

Campaign rallying cry:

Join us tomorrow for an overview of the first sibling duo (that we know of) to run for President.

[Image from]

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

So much more can be said!