Saturday, October 25, 2008

Presidential Candidate #4: The Tarrasque

Today we're introducing a rather... unconventional candidate. I would say that no further introduction is necessary because this candidate speaks for itself, but... well, this candidate doesn't speak.

The TarrasquePresidential candidate: The Tarrasque

Party affiliation: No, no. The Tarrasque doesn't affiliate with parties. The Tarrasque fully ate parties.

Legendary; virtually unstoppable destructive force; about as tall as a five-story building; survived the conversion to 4th Edition

Reason for devouring running mate: Hunger

Positions on the issues:
- Health care: One word--regeneration
- Foreign policy: Eat everything in sight
- Domestic policy: See above
- National security: Eaten
- Economic crisis: Run for your lives
- Dependency on foreign oil: No, seriously, run for your lives
- Zinc mining: We're all gonna die
- Aaaaargh

Chances of being elected: Burp

Oh, dear.

We're nearly done with introducing new candidates, but come back tomorrow and Monday to see what other candidates we can dig up.

[Image from]

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